Well... We Had a Baby!

I know, I'm so good at blogging all the time! Once every couple years is good right?

So to update, we are still living in Juneau and we had a baby boy named Jaxon David McDonald! :) He was born on September 6, 2013 at 2:33am. 7.5lbs and 22 inches long! Long and lean.

I don't know where to begin; pregnancy story, delivery, the first several weeks of hell, the first couple of months of adjusting to mother-hood, or the current life of being a mom? Lol.... That's the problem of only doing an update once in a blue moon...

I guess I can just give a summary the pregnancy, labor and first few moments, and then update the rest in another post.

How I found out I was pregnant: I found out in January 2013, I was a little late, and moody. And John said to me, "Man, I wouldn't be surprised if you were pregnant, you are so emotional!" Well, that sparked my interest into taking a pregnancy test. I thought I would wait until the morning, since that is the best time to check, but then I thought, hey why not? I will check this evening and tomorrow morning. (I kept pregnancy tests in stock in my home) And to my very shock and surprise, I saw 2 lines show up! I gasped, and read the instructions to be sure that's what it meant, even though there were plenty of times I would check and only see one line. So deep down I knew this was different. I couldn't really contain the excitement or nerves enough to think of some clever way to tell John. I just ran out and showed John the evidence. He was pretty dang shocked and excited, and yes, he teared up a bit. Even though he won't admit it. Neither one of us are good at keeping secrets, or containing excitement, so we called his parent and mine and Christina to tell them the good news.

 

Pregnancy: Overall, the pregnancy was so easy!! I hardly had any morning sickness. Yes, I was more emotional, and yes, I was queezy every now and then when I was hungry. And when I was hungry, John learned very quickly, it was time for food... NOW! I craved garlic bread and nachos. Oh yeah, and every morning when I brushed my teeth, I had to be very careful not to gag myself, because for some reason, I was super sensitive to gagging and making myself sick while brushing during the entire pregnancy.

I was so set on having a girl. I thought through the entire pregnancy before finding out the gender, I was going to have a girl. I envisioned a girl, it felt like a girl.... So when it came time to find out the gender, I was very surprised and a little disappointed that we were going to be having a boy. I went back into work, shocked, and I even cried!! I made a bet with my brother-in-law, Heber, I was having a girl. He thought I was going to have a boy, and so whoever won, owed the other, a steak dinner when we went to Utah to visit. Looked like I owed him a steak dinner. It took a while to get used to the idea of boy, and to turn my imagination from ribbons and bows, to Carharts and trucks.

I ended up having Gestational Diabetes. I was so horrified and scared and sad, and angry! But as I learned more about it, and how to manage it, I sucked it up and made it through. Luckily, there were other women around me that went through the same thing who helped me, and gave me recipes, tips, and support. The most annoying part about it was checking my sugar levels every 2 hours. It consumed me. There was no more enjoying those nachos or garlic bread... While, I could still eat them, it wasn't fun any more, since I was so worried about keeping my sugar levels where they needed to be. But in the end, it really was a blessing in disguise. It helped me make wiser food choices. I became more active, by going on longer walks everyday. I didn't gain anymore than the 30lbs I was supposed to gain. I did end up needing insulin to maintain better levels, but it wasn't because I was cheating. I can honestly say, I was perfect at eating the right amount of carbs on most days. So I blame the hormones, and I blame the blasted heat! Juneau isn't known for it's high temperatures, but of course, this summer was the exception! I was miserable!! Lol.

I worked the entire way through the pregnancy. I was determined to work all the way through. I didn't want to quit early, when I could work and pay off my car before the baby came. We had decided I would quit and be a "stay-at-home mom" but I wasn't going to start until the baby was actually here. I feel like the Lord blessed me with a good pregnancy for me to be able to do that. It was a righteous desire to be out of debt.

We made one more trip to Utah before the baby came too. It was like a "Last Hurrah" or Vacation being kid-less. We had a really good time, despite the heat. We went to Yuba lake with Christina, Ellie and Heber. We stalked up on baby supplies at the Babies 'R Us, and we went and saw Mo and Julia and kids in Pocatello, Idaho too. We even got to catch up with our friend's, the Allreds, in Seattle, during a 4 hour layover.

As far as feeling the baby kick, I felt them, but seriously, every time I tried to get John to feel them, they would stop! John maybe felt the baby kick a handful of times, if that!! It drove me crazy, because I wanted John to be able to get excited and to see his amusement in the pregnancy, but that didn't happen. It didn't become real to him, until the baby was actually out.

We went through a list of names, it came down to Jacob, Jacobus (John's favorite, pronounced Yocobus, I wasn't a fan) Jaxon, David, Todd, Torres Ramsey, Douglas, and Ronald. ;) Okay, we aren't that mean, we teased about naming him Ronald McDonald, but we wouldn't really do it. It was narrowed down to Jaxon. We found it online, and it stood out to me above all the rest. But the next question was, would it be the first name or middle name. John really liked David Jaxon, and we would call him Jaxon. But I was never a fan of naming my kid a name we wouldn't primarily use. We chose David because it's my grandpa's name and John's dad's name. So we talked and kind of bickered a bit about whether is would be Jaxon David or David Jaxon. And didn't make a decision until after he was born.

Nearing the End: So, my doctor. was taking precautions with me, because of the gestational diabetes. He wanted to go by the book and the medical practice's policies. He thought that we should induce at 39 weeks, to avoid having a 10lbs baby come out of me. We did an ultrasound, and while the results didn't show him being that much bigger than he was supposed to be, out of precaution, he still felt we should induce.... I wasn't happy about it, because I wasn't ready mentally or physically for that. I always imagined that my water would break, and I would naturally go into labor when the time was right. Rushing to the hospital, with all the excitement of the unknown. Inducing would take that portion of the excitement away. But being my first baby, and really not knowing I had any other option, I consented. We were going to start the inducing process on Tuesday, September 3, 2014. The day after Labor day. We did all we could, to "naturally" start labor all week-end long, and on labor day. Lots of walking, stairs, bouncing, and yes, even castor oil. The castor oil gave me mild contractions, but they went away.

So here is the series of events:

9/1/2013-Sunday Afternoon:  Castor Oil, mild contractions through the night. Then stopped.

9/2/2013-Monday: No contractions, spent the day enjoying the sunshine. Walking around Eagle Beach, just trying to take in the last few moments of my life without children, and enjoy the last page of this chapter in my life.

9/3/2013-Tuesday: Went to hospital, induced with Cytotec, lots of walking around the hospital. Dilated to 1cm. Very little progression. Spent the night in hopes that it would pick up. It didn’t.:

We packed our bags with the  i-pod, Lord of the Rings, chapstick, hair things, and of course, my “Special K bars” that I have been craving all pregnancy but couldn’t eat because it would throw my sugar levels for a loop. So I had John make them so I could finally savor each bite after I had my baby. We had additional snacks for John. And toothbrush, toothpaste, and changes of clothes for both of us. And of course, we didn’t forget  our birth plan.

Tuesday morning came. We got into the hospital, they checked my sugar levels, they got us breakfast, (I was so excited, because I thought I wouldn’t be allowed to eat!) They stuck an IV in my arm. The doctor came and checked my cervix. I was barely dilated, but my cervix was soft. Then they started me on Cytotec, a mild drug to get my cervix dilating. I had mild cramps, but nothing horrible. I wasn’t having very good contractions so, they suggested that I start walking around the hospital wings, to see if that helps move things along. We walked a lot. All day, we walked the stairs hoping that I would progress. They checked me, and I only dilated to a 1-1.5…. So the evening came, and we decided to go to sleep. I didn’t progress at all. The on-call Dr. said I needed to start Pitocin in the morning. 

9/4/2013-Wednesday: Started Pitocin, hard, painful contractions. Very small progress. Only Dilated to a 2! Got sent home to sleep off drugs, and come back in the morning to start again.

8:00 a.m. rolled around and they started the pitocin. I could feel the affects within minutes. This day was an extremely emotional day for me and John as well. The contraction hurt, and were intense!! Every hour or so they would check how dilated I was, I would get so frustrated because I wouldn't progress!! Towards the end, I wasn't sure how many more contractions I could take, I was so sore!! I kept having high hopes that I was nearing the end, and it would be time to push, so imagine my disappointment to find out I had only dilated to a flipping 2cm all freaking day long?!!! Then they came in to discharge me, since I just wasn't progressing quickly enough, and they felt I should go home, and take a bath, get a good night's sleep and come back in the morning for another round of Pitocin. I was so angry that I was going home without my baby. All of my expectations went down the drain, and I started to get angry at the fact that I was being induced, when my body wasn't ready to give birth. How bad would it have really been to wait an extra week, to my due date to give birth, or induce then? My body would have probably been a little more receptive, I think. 

John and I went home, I worked through the rest of the drug induced contractions in the bath tub for an hour or so. Then we went to bed, and laid awake talking about this week, our hopes, fears, disappointments, and what we want to do going forward with faith. We prayed together, and cried together. And made the decision that I was NOT going to go back tomorrow morning. My body wasn't ready, and I didn't feel like going through the same pain again to only dilate to a 3.... We decided that we would tell our Dr. the plan, and make sure that we would be okay, and it wasn't a huge emergency to get him out.

9/5/2013-Thursday: Didn’t go back in, I was done! Started natural contractions 10 minutes apart through the morning. Then 8 minutes, then 5, then 2, then 1-2 minutes apart. Went back to hospital.

We called the hospital to tell them we weren't coming back, and asked if that was okay. They seemed surprised, but then told me to call our doctor at his office. It was 5am, so he wasn't going to be in until 8am. So by the time we got a hold of him, he already knew, because he swung by the hospital to check on me before heading to the office, only to find out I wasn't there! lol. He told us, that it wasn't an emergency, and all he can do is give us recommendations, but in the end it was up to us. So we kept with our decision.

My parent's were in town, because they knew I was going to be induced and expected me to give birth on Tuesday! My sister had to be induced with Dodge, and that's how it worked for her. (This is another thing; I felt a lot of pressure to have this baby, from my doctor. and from the fact that my parents were in town, for only a week and few days, and John started his leave, and only had a week off, and I still didn't have this baby, and it was Thursday. I hated the pressure to give birth, when he wasn't ready to come... I'm SO doing things differently the next time around. Ugghhh) Anyway, they were in town, so we all went out to breakfast, and while we were getting ready to head to breakfast, the contractions started coming back. They were about 10 minutes apart and continued all through breakfast.

We went on a few errands, bought some more baby clothes, but I was starting to feel tired, still being sore from all the hard contractions the night before, so we went home. I headed straight for the bath again. The contractions continued still in the bath. I got out, so they wouldn't slow down. And we started to play Phase 10.... That's when the contractions got worse, and closer together.

They started happening frequently to the point that John started timing them them while we played. They were about 5-8 minutes apart. It got to a point, that every time it came around to being my turn again, I needed to take a break and work through a contraction. My mom kept saying we should go back to the hospital, and I shot her down over and over again. I teased that I was NOT going back to the hospital unless my water broke and there was a head sticking out of me. I kept explaining, that I had these severe contractions yesterday, and only dilated to 2cm. So I didn't want to show up at the hospital only to find out I'm at 3cm! We kept playing, but then the contractions came so often, and for longer periods of time, that we decided to take a break from playing and research where I'm at in the laboring process. We looked at a handout I was given in my birthing class that talked about early and active labor. As my mom tracked my contractions, she pointed out that I was in active labor now, which goes quicker than early labor. She tried to convince me it was time to go back. I told her no again through a long contraction, and then about 1 minute passed, and I was having another long contraction. I then realized, that she was probably right, it might be time to go back....

So we hustled, as best we could (there was no walking through contractions at this point.) John was taking a survey over the phone standing on the porch, I shot him a look, and might have been a little snappy in my tone with him, that he needed to come be actively involved now, so he got off the phone quickly, and we all headed to the hospital.

We get there, I would say, it was about... 5:00pm, and John goes to check us in while I went straight to the maternity ward. They get me in the room, check my cervix, and I'm dilated to a 9! Just kidding, a 6.... But hey, they said it was going to go quicker this time, and that going home would be a bad idea. :) 

Epidural: Yes please! I waited for the anesthesiologist, and was very impatient. He finally comes, tells me to try to hold still as he puts the needle in my back.... Yeah, that was soooooo hard to do while working through contractions at the same time. And then I was surprised because, it didn't kick in right away. I kept feeling pain, and I was hoping that I would stop feeling pain any moment. Then I finally stopped feeling pain... on the right side of my body, but on the left, I was completely aware of the contractions. So I was told to lay on my side to let the drugs work their way to that side of the body. It's quite amazing actually, how drugs work.

I was quite happy and content once the drugs kicked in. I would turn to look at the monitor, and say, "Hey look, I'm having a contraction".... It was so lovely.

It didn't seem very long after I had my epidural and I was relaxing that my mom started to cry. She said, "Your contractions stopped, I have been watching the monitor and you haven't been having any for a while." Then the nurse came in to check to see if the monitor got moved around on my belly since they didn't see any contractions either. They called our doctor in, and he told us, that sometimes contractions fade away a bit and then come back. We can either wait, or we can start Pitocin again to see if we could get it going again. We chose to just wait. Even though, I couldn't feel the contractions, I just wasn't in the mood to jump on drugs again, when I have come this far on my own. So we waited.

The nurse came in to put a catheter in me, and said she would check me while she was down there. When she did, she gave the happy news that I was fully dilated! Yay! So we just needed to wait for the contractions to come back and I could start pushing. Our doctor said that when the contractions came back and the baby started moving down the birth canal, it would be time to turn off the epidural so I could feel the urge to push and feel the pushes when it got closer to time. I was so not excited about the idea of that.

The contractions came back. And can I just say, I love my nurse?! She said that we could do "practice pushes" with the epidural, so that when it was time to "really push", Jaxon would at least be close to the opening, and I would know what kind of pushes they are looking for. She was awesome, she was helping me have this baby with my epidural, and I love her for that!! It was a little tricky trying to push without feeling my legs, but it wasn't that hard, I still felt pressure, so I made each push count. Someone had told me that when you push, you want it to feel like you are using the muscle to push out a bowl movement. So that's what I did, and luckily, I didn't actually poop! I was told that was also a common thing to do, so yay me! Sorry, that might be too much information, but hey, it was all part of the birthing experience. ;)

I felt the urge to vomit, which, I told was also normal, they had a nice blue bag for me, and it got used. After I vomited I felt much better, and like it was time to push again. This time, I was told not to push, because they needed to get the doctor. He came in, thinking we still had time, but then saw the hair of my baby's head, and was surprised, because he wasn't aware that we were in there doing, "Practice pushes." Muahhahaa, all with the epidural still on!


9/6/2013- Friday: September 6, 2013, Jaxon was born at 2:33am.

After he was out of me, they wiped him down, as I requested in my birth plan, and asked if I was satisfied, or wanted him to be cleaned up more, but at that point, I just wanted him in my arms! So I said, "No, give him to me!!" The nurse and doctor laughed, as if they knew that would happen. John was reaching for the camera, (this photo is cropped, yeah, he wasn't too good at helping me appear to be modest here, granted, he had plenty of other things on his mind.) This is the first few minutes of Jaxon's life in my arms. 

I was so overwhelmed with so many emotions, relief, shock, happiness, love, fear of what's next, surprised of how tiny he was, and pure joy. 

They delivered the placenta, started the clean up process. Took Jaxon to weigh him. I was thinking it, but decided to bite my tongue, as to not ruin the moment, but I was slightly furious, that he wasn't at the very least, 8.5lbs. Just because of the traumatizing rushed birth experience I had this whole week, all because of the concern of his weight. When we could have waited one more week, and still wouldn't have had a weight issue. But what was done, was done. And he was here. And most importantly he was alert and healthy.

Everything after that seems to be a haze, I was on some adrenalin rush, I'm sure, so when it was all done, I was so exhausted and as much as I loved this little baby, I wanted to set him in his sleeping bin so I could fall asleep. But felt guilty for not wanting to hold him longer and stare at him longer, so I held him longer, until, I just couldn't any more and gave him to John. Then John was so exhausted that he went out to the nurses station to see what he could do with the baby. lOl, it's funny, now thinking about it, we both just had no idea what we were doing!

Well, I think I will leave the story there for now, and pick up the remaining story of nursing woes, and learning to become a mom for another post.